Wednesday, January 31, 2007

New NW Neighborhood Discovered: Coladams Circle

My wife and I live down the hill from Meridian Hill, not in Dupont Circle, but not quite in Columbia Heights or Adams Morgan, and definitely not Logan, and too far west for Shaw, but maybe the U Street corridor depending on the map you look at, and very near the Strivers Section Historic District but not in it, and I’m not sure exactly where Cardozo is, so maybe we’re there? It’s really hard to tell people, quickly, what neighborhood we live in. So I’ve come up with a new neighborhood name just for our condo (not our condo building, mind you , just our actual apartment): Coladams Circle.

Creating your own neighborhood opens up a world of possibilities, ranging from street festivals (Coladams Circle Day!), for which we are entitled to police protection, free balloons, all kinds of ethnic food, and some sort of frozen desert product, like Italian ice or sherbet (I think, I’ll have to check on the last one), to various city grants to help fund the activities of the newly formed Coladams Circle Citizens Association, which of course will present strong opposition to every proposal brought before the ANC, once we figure out which ANC we’re actually in.

I’d also like to apply for money to start the Coladams Circle Business Improvement District, because, let me tell you, business in the neighborhood is woeful, nearly non-existent. There’s not even a liquor store (unless you count the cabinet where we store liquor, which, I guess, you’d have to) or a Starbucks, which is surprising since we drink A LOT of coffee here in Coladams Circle. The only commercial venture making any money at all in Coladams Circle is the Swear Jar, but as our “community improvement” projects finish up, it, too, may see a drop in business.

And finally, I can now apply to the city to get free trash bags and hand tools for use during our soon to be inaugurated Coladams Circle Neighborhood Clean-up Day. The city will even send over a truck to haul all the trash away!

The only thing left is to lobby Metro to add Coladams Circle to a Metro station name. Apparently, it’s pretty easy: Adams Morgan got their name on the Woodley Park station, even though it’s definitely NOT in Adams Morgan, and both Fairfax and GMU are piggybacking on Vienna’s station (having made the trip countless times to GMU via Metro, let me tell you, you’ll be in for a rude surprise and a long, long, looooong walk if you fall for THAT one!) I can see it now: U Street/African American Civil War Memorial/Cardozo/Coladams Circle. Then, I could answer any cabbie’s “where to,” with “to Coladams Circle!”


Ar-Jew-Tino said...

Can I sit on the public works committee of the citizens' association?

Also, I think you need to apply for a liquor license if you're going to have that liquor cabinet.

Golden Silence said...

Yeah, there is no solid definition of where one neighborhood begins or ends, is there? One of DC's many quirks.

boyinthebands said...

I used to live in this area. Used to say, "Oh, it's kinda between . . . ."

megandasmus said...

Can we apply for a Beautification Grant for CC? Funds could be used to purchase that new Kwest sweater I've been hearing so much about.

Or maybe apply for DC Historical District Status for the old sweater?